blairmacg | Tomorrow, This Year

My sis is a flight attendant, so you can guess where she must be on busy travel days. Our family has grown accustomed to flexible holiday celebrations and last minute changes, and this year is no different. As of Saturday, we all decided to move the family dinner to Friday so my sis could be there with her kids.

But it is different, because it's the first year without Dev's father. I thought to mitigate that by finding a place for Dev and I to volunteer Thursday. Well, this has apparently been a bumper year for volunteers, and there isn't much room for a couple more. (Who would have thought?) I still have a couple calls out, though. We shall see.

If nothing comes through, we do have standing invitations from friends to join their families for the day. My folks would also be fine with us getting together for an "unofficial" Thanksgiving on Thanksgiving. But we may decide to do something completely different. Right now, we're leaning toward a long hike in the woods followed by a fireside dinner. It's supposed to be a lovely, sunny day.

Dev and I are both doing okay. Neither of us are on the verge of falling apart over the holidays. But we're quite aware of who won't be at the family dinner. Everything feels weird. Even feeling good feels weird. In fact, feeling good and happy sometimes makes me feel guilty, which would make Ron roll his eyes. He'd be pretty pissed off if Dev and I stopped living, if we stopped enjoying life. So I guess we're just stuck with the weirdness.

I am thankful, first and foremost, for my fabulous, kind, strong, and intelligent son. I am thankful for my goofy, loving dogs. I'm thankful for my family. I am grateful for the new friends I've made this year, and for the old friends who are stuck by me for so long. And I am thankful for the time I had with Ron, right up to the end.

My you discover new blessings, and hold tightly to the old.